PUSSIFICATION OF THE NFL

A Man's Sport In Decline

During a pre-season game a few days ago your Ostrich Killer observed with surprise that one of the officials had tucked a pony tail up beneath the official's hat.  His surprise increased when he discovered that the official was a female.  He immediately wondered what every other red-blooded male wondered: how many snaps has she taken under center?  How many runs up the middle has she made?  How many downfield blocks has she thrown?  How many times has she been sacked?

Then your Ostrich Killer wondered if part of the qualification criteria for any NFL official candidate includes a personal history of having played football for a few years in order to have a player's insights into the game.  I don't know the answer to that, but if officials are NOT required to have played football, then of course there's no reason - other than the mothering / nurturing instinct - a female could not be such an official.  A game being regulated by officials who've never played the game has obvious issues.

Which brings us to another topic: the Richard Sherman Nullification order coming out of the NFL head office.  That order is why you are seeing so many 'illegal contact' and 'holding' calls against pass defenders this pre-season.  Penalties per game are up dramatically since last year's preseason - about double - and more since a handful of years ago.  

I don't know about most NFL game viewers, but when your Ostrich Killer watches a game where yellow flags fall out of the sky like snowflakes he starts channel surfing.  If your Ostrich Killer isn't alone in his boredom / disgust, the NFL might notice viewership numbers that don't quite reach their targets.  And that would be a good thing.

One last thought: the NFL Richard Sherman Nullification order is a guaranteed first down getter for struggling offenses.  Here's how it goes in the huddle:  "Okay guys, we need a first down.  All you receivers go out, and when you get ten yards down the field juke and swerve sneakily so that the pass defender runs into you.  That'll draw an illegal contact flag against the defender, and we'll make five yards and an automatic first down.  On Three!"

Your Ostrich Killer officially predicts this unless the NFL modifies its order.  Watch and see.  And then start channel surfing, because football is dying and it will be too painful to watch it being de-testosteroned.